Do I believe in karma? I believe in karma the way I believe in ghosts: not really, but I still won’t be rude in a house that might be haunted. It’s less a cosmic ledger and more a decent survival strategy.

I don’t think the universe is out here auditing my behavior with a clipboard, waiting to dock me a parking spot because I was short with a barista in 2019. But I have absolutely felt the specific dread of thinking “this is going to come back on me” and then having it, in fact, come back on me, which is either karma or just Tuesday.

Mostly what I believe in is that people remember how you treated them, and eventually you run into them again, usually at the worst possible moment. That’s not mysticism. That’s just a small town with better lighting.

So I hedge. I hold doors. I tip well. Just in case the universe is keeping a tab and I’m currently overdrawn.